LIFE LESSONS ON THE PATH OF HAPPINESS – Self Knowledge, Self Pity & Expectations

A friend pointed out recently, happiness cannot be fully experienced without suffering through depression. To me, depression is very much like fire; you only have to get burnt one time in order to understand what it is and not be burnt in the future. Sadness and depression are different. Sadness is a momentary or temporary coming down of spirits. Depression is the over-extension of sadness, where the mood and its symptoms define who you are. Many of us think depression and happiness are modes/moods of which you enter and leave, repeatedly.

 

Those in the throes of depression do not understand and/or realize what that depression represents to them. To understand is to grab something with your reason; not necessarily changing your behavior. To realize is to grasp something not only with one’s reason but also within one’s belief system, which leads to a change in behavior. It’s in that realization which enables the individual to come from under being depressed: with or without the use of drugs and therapy. If I observe you, I can eventually tell what you believe. How? Through your behavior. We act on our beliefs.

 

My therapy was through self analysis. That analysis came through examining my beliefs with respect to the problems in my life. Why did I believe what I believe? Were my personal experiences the basis of my beliefs? If not, re-examine my life experiences to see if the beliefs are true. If the beliefs are based on what love ones or people I respect have told me, see the previous sentence. A valid belief works 100% of the time. 99% and it’s not valid. Conflicting beliefs are two or more beliefs held simultaneously however oppose each other. Therefore, canceling out one’s objective. Ex. I want a man that’s loyal. Belief: All men are dogs. Creation: No man is true in one’s mind because the belief is no man is loyal. Even if the man is honorable.

 

 

 

YOU CREATE YOUR OWN REALITY THROUGH YOUR BELIEFS.

 

Being depressed even has the sound of a person accepting an emotion and letting it define them. The idea of living is being. That being is defined by what you do. Not by the things you possess. Often folks who are wealthy financially with all of life’s comforts wonder why they are still unhappy – read the previous two sentences.

 

There is a malaise that hangs over the U.S. where citizens are depressed, anxious, financially strained, lovelorn (with and without a mate), and stressed out from family pressures. They don’t have enough time to take out an hour a day for themselves. If you’re not happy with what you’re doing, you can’t afford NOT to have an hour to yourself. Even if it means getting up early. Create the new habit of getting to know who you are.

 

ATTITUDE

 

– is a key element to establishing your Path Of Happiness. Here are some pertinent things to keep in mind.

LIFE

– is not what you possess, it’s what you do! Choose better activities.

RESPONSIBILITY

– when you interact with others behave as though you are going to be on the receiving end of your actions.

SELF PITY

– without self pity we become invulnerable. When your feelings are hurt, it’s time for self examination. Why am I hurt? Do I believe I am what someone else thinks of me? Why? It’s not the event, it’s how you respond to it. When we don’t allow the words and opinions of others to impinge on how we feel about ourselves – YOU ARE ALMOST SUPER HUMAN.

BE THE KIND OF PERSON YOU WOULD WANT IN YOUR LIFE.

Watch how your life changes. If you don’t like being by yourself, examine why. Shouldn’t you be your best friend? Plus, the type of people you attract in your life changes. Notice the word attract.

THE ANSWERS LIE WITHIN, MY FRIENDS!

The best thing you can do for yourself is to explore your inner life. You sleep a third of your life away, why not check out what’s goin’ on? Thoughts, ideas, intuition, dreams, and the like where do they come from? Who and what am I? Explore your dreams. They are a laboratory for living. Your personal power is within you. You are creating your own reality. Why not create one that is more to your liking? A great man once said, THE KINGDOM OF GOD IS WITHIN. Isn’t it time you checked it out? Why do we put off getting to know ourselves?

FIND YOUR PASSIONS

 

– They are the path to everything life has to offer.

IF YOU KEEP YOUR WANTS, DESIRES AND EXPECTATIONS TO A MINIMUM, EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS A GIFT. TO LOVE SOMEONE IS TO ALLOW THEM TO BE WHO AND WHAT THEY ARE. EVEN IF IT MEANS NOT HAVING THEM IN YOUR LIFE.

 

The simplicity of life is only complicated by your ignorance of self.

 

TAKE THE TOUR!

 

QUESTION EVERYTHING! THAT’S WHERE THE TRUTH RESIDES.

GOD, SIN AND FREE WILL – DO YOU KNOW THE RULES TO THE GAME OF LIFE?

Those who suffer tragedy, atheists, and so-called believers in Christ will often ask the question, IF GOD EXISTS, WHY IS THERE SO MUCH MISERY IN THE WORLD? Why do children suffer, why do good people in my family suffer, and why is there so much hate in the world?

 

These questions let you know that these are folks who have no idea, understanding or realization of what life is about. They don’t know how to play the game. Many of these folks have little idea as to who and what they are. If you’ve spent your life totally focused on your physical identity with little attention to your inner identity, you are in the dark with respect to living.

 

It’s like watching a movie, but with the sound muted. You have a general idea of the movie from watching the visual content but the details are missing because there wasn’t any sound. That’s similar to the way one lives one’s life without knowledge of their inner world. There is a serious disconnect between you and life, when you’re not connected to your inner workings.

 

Now, let’s get the rules straight about how life works. First, the events of our physical lives are allowed to happen because we create these events collectively and individually. We have been given

 

 

 

TOTAL FREE WILL over our actions, behavior and thoughts. The physical realm is one of producing inner thoughts, ideas, dreams, intuitions, etc. into physical manifestations. Everything is created from an idea, thought or dream, first. SO BLAMING GOD FOR YOUR OWN CREATIONS STEMS FROM IGNORANCE OF WHO AND WHAT YOU ARE AND HOW THE GAME OF LIFE IS PLAYED.

 

If I told you the rules of the game, most of you wouldn’t believe me. And while you may think I’m some kind of kook, I’m happy, independent with a lot of love in my life with a sense of my own power, and I’m not blaming others for negative things that occur. Many, who look at this thinking askance, are living a life they have created without realizing it. If you’re not happy with your life, how can you tell someone who is, that they’re full of shit. Maybe they know how to be happy and you don’t. You have something to learn from them.

 

To play any game, you’ve got to know how it’s played and what the parameters or rules are. If you’re missing one or both of those parts, you probably won’t do well.

 

WHAT IS THE GAME OF LIFE? –

 

 

 

The game of life is one of Identity. Where the Spiritual identity you are `before’ you are born is forgotten to allow your physical identity to experience free will, or not being in the flow of the Spirit. In this physical realm we are to learn how to manifest our ideas, thoughts, dreams, and intuitions into physical reality where we all, collectively and individually, create this physical environment through our belief systems. The second aspect of the game is to remember your greater identity that you’ve forgotten. This is pertinent because the rules of the game lie within you, in your Spiritual identity.

 

Note: The discussion of having different parts to us, reason, inner self, belief system, outer self, Spirit, Greater Spirit, etc. is ONLY used as a means to understanding. There are no divisions within us.

 

WHAT ARE THE RULES OF THE GAME?

 

 

 

– Our Spirit operates according to Spiritual Law. These are the rules of the game. However, as a physical being that has forgotten that identity, you tend to forget that Spiritual Law affects your physical well being, so you ignore it. Thus, you have another reason for discovering your Spiritual Identity.

 

Spiritual Law is LOVE, SOWING AND REAPING (KARMA), SEEK AND YOU WILL FIND, ASK AND YOU WILL RECEIVE, KNOCK AND DOORS WILL OPEN.

 

Love is basically, what is within is to be manifested or made physical. We think of love in a romantic and family sense, but love has much more to do with creativity. Creation is love. Going inside to find the ideas, thoughts, dreams and passions to manifest in this physical world. This is love. Believe it or not romantic and family love, and love for one’s fellow person stem from feelings inside that these people represent symbolically to you.

 

We are believers. We act on our beliefs. Your inner Spirit is not only a witness to life, but creates your physical reality according to your beliefs about self and life. Your reason is based on your belief system. That system is only healthy if your beliefs are based on your personal experiences and not the beliefs of those you love and respect. If not, your reason is based on invalid and/or conflicting beliefs that can harm your health (mentally and physically), relationships and in not creating the life, truly desired.

 

Sowing and Reaping (Karma) is a rule.

 

 

 

THE ENERGY YOU PUT INTO THE WORLD WILL COME BACK AT YOU BIGGER AND STRONGER. So if your behavior in life is disrespectful to others, you shouldn’t be surprised that the world responds to you in kind – with a lack of respect.

 

The religious world has looked at sin in a very dramatic way that had nothing to do with what Jesus/Christ was illustrating. We think of sin as somehow going against God. Sin is engaging in behavior that goes against self. How does this happen? Through Sowing and Reaping! If you steal from another, you bring that energy on yourself bigger and stronger. THE SIN IS IN YOUR IGNORANCE OF THE FACT THAT YOU ARE IMPACTING YOUR LIFE WITH THIS NEGATIVE ENERGY.

 

For example, people hate usually because they are lacking self worth and are ignorant of Spiritual Law. People often hate, by feeling better about themselves by putting down others (a temporary high), instead of dealing with the issue that really has them feeling low about themselves. Hateful people tend to lead ugly lives. The hate impacts them greatly!

 

HOW DO I EXPLORE MY INNER WORLD? –

 

 

 

You explore your inner world through your dreams, thoughts, ideas, emotions, intuitions and passions, and in understanding the symbols of your dream and waking life. There’s a lot going on inside you. The workings of your physical body are maintained by your Spiritual self, freeing you to live without thinking about valves opening and secretions of fluids and the myriad of other body functions. But this is all in the realm of your inner world. You are more in control of your health than you believe.

 

They way you see the world is individual and collective. But that perception is formed by what is in your belief system. The areas of your life that are most problematic are the first to examine. The beliefs behind what you are doing and experiencing are either invalid and/or conflicting bringing about a result you don’t want. Once you’ve discovered the beliefs that fall into that category, it’s important to take an action that goes along with the new belief to solidify replacing the old belief.

 

YOU CREATE YOUR REALITY. TO CREATE A REALITY THAT’S FULFILLING MEANS ELIMINATING INVALID AND CONFLICTING BELIEFS AND LIVING YOUR PASSIONS.

 

Remember, God is Spirit AND so are we! You have a direct connection to your Spirit leading to the Greater one. The Answers Lie Within!

 

QUESTION EVERYTHING! THAT’S WHERE THE TRUTH RESIDES.

YOUR ROMANTIC LOVE CHOICE MAY BE BASED MORE ON THE SYMBOLIC MEANING TO YOU, THAN CHEMISTRY.

Love at first sight! How many of us hold this romantic idea and imagine its possibility? Being in love can be a personal heaven or hell depending on where you and your lover are in life’s continuum. Falling in love is like entering a higher state of consciousness where every other experience is highlighted with a totally different vibe. This changes when you don’t take the time to think about how you came to that blissful feeling in the first place, only to allow it to dissipate in familiarity.

 

So many of us seek partners that offer us something tangibly and intangibly that we don’t believe we have. Or the partner is able to draw something out of you that you haven’t been able to manifest yourself. So an average guy may feel that wooing a very attractive woman makes him look like he’s an interesting someone in public and makes him feel he has value. Even though he may not feel as strong in those areas inside.  A shy woman who doesn’t feel she can be herself in public may seek a guy who appears physically strong as a mate because he makes her feel safe enough to be who she wants to be.

 

The beliefs in each instance may have the seekers seeing something in these partners that isn’t there. So, instead of the very attractive woman really loving this guy, she’s playing him because he’s willing to take her to the places she wants to go and buy expensive gifts. However, would leave him at the drop of a hat if a more attractive guy appeared willing to do the same things or more for her. The so-called strong man may project this image in public to cover up his insecurities as a man. So he over-compensates by being super macho in public. In private, he still over compensates by being chauvinistic and/or abusive in private while feeling emotionally weak.

 

In each case it’s the beliefs of the seekers that caused them to see only what they wanted to see versus the true personality they fell in love with. How long have we held on to someone due to an image we had of them? Even when others could see evidence of things you were misconstruing. In life most of us are only what people think we are in their life play. Those things aren’t usually your true essence. It usually takes someone who knows oneself well, who can see the truth in others.

 

Every one in your life has a literal meaning and a symbolic meaning in your life. On the daily level one’s mother can be a very good nurturer. However, symbolically she could be a woman who was fearful, secretive and untrusting. The son, who loves the mother, may as an adult look unconsciously for a woman with those qualities that comes in a totally different package from his mom. So he may have chosen someone thinking she was different from his mom, but now must explore the fear, secretiveness, and lack of trust with his woman that he was unable to with his mom. This ultimately may bring the two of them closer through greater understanding, and in the potential in overcoming those impediments.

 

“He who never questions, never learns.’ Mr. Luckey

 

Symbolism is directly related to questioning your personal reality. Whether you choose someone for their looks, kindness, generosity, because they were into you, financial security, emotional security, creativity, sincerity, submission to you, etc. it’s the questioning of what is behind these things that you learn the most about you. The qualities you are most enamored with your mate are the ones to begin with.

 

Why do you like this quality in your mate? What does this quality say about you? Do you remember the first time you felt this way about this quality and the person who exhibited it? What were the circumstances that it showed itself? How did you feel about this at the time? It is in this examination that you start to see intricacies that make you what you are. It’s in this understanding and realization that allows you to become more aware of the moments of your life.

 

It’s in the moments of our lives that we make choices – usually unconsciously. However, this knowledge, in the moment, allows you to see more than the one or two choices you may have only been seeing previously. There are a multiplicity of choices available to us in the moment.

 

But, we have to be fast or slow enough to capture them. The Power of Silence is what often shows us the way.

 

More on that next go round.

 

QUESTION EVERYTHING!  THAT’S WHERE THE TRUTH RESIDES

HOW SELF WORTH, TRUTH & IGNORANCE AFFECT OUR DAILY LIVES.

Ego, materialism and money is often confused with Self Worth/Love. Popular opinion is usually confused as truth. Ignorance, based on emotion, is easier to swallow (like junk food over nutritious food) because it caters to our baser instincts.

 

We are born into a world of no rhyme or reason with our parents or guardians attempting to explain a system they don’t fully understand themselves. Life is an inside to outside to inside dynamic. Self knowledge allows us to find the truth within ourselves, which then allows us to see it in our personal lives and others. Self knowledge is your honing device for truth. We activate this device by questioning everything. We then gauge the answers we receive through filtering them through our personal knowledge regarding human behavior. Lies, usually, don’t fit within the pattern of truth.

 

The promotion of the drug, Gardasil, has been widespread, the last few years, with the commercial of young girls singing about being ONE LESS, ONE LESS regarding cervical cancer. Not only did the drug company push this commercially, but our government has been considering a national program of injecting girls as young as 12 years with this drug. The truth is this drug only treats some forms of cervical cancer leaving others lethal. [An aside: Why is it better to take a drug using a needle than smoking it – as in the case of marijuana?]

Now we have a case of one young lady using this drug becoming paralyzed. http://www.injuryboard.com/national-news/did-gardasil-vaccine-cause-a-12-yr-olds-paralysis.aspx?googleid=28460 There are thousands of complaints about serious health problems regarding the drug.

I’ve had major concerns about Gardasil since it came out with it’s strong promotion for young girls to use, and the facility of the government to think we should use this on our young girls nation-wide without properly vetting the drug. Why do Americans tend to accept information from government agencies without question? Irresponsibility! I’ve had so many women put me down because I wasn’t a Gardasil fan. But look at the evidence: 3700 deaths per year from cervical cancer. 55,000 women die from breast cancer a year. Heart disease kills 350,000 women a year. At least 100,000 women per year die from drug and hospital errors. Why do we rush to protect our daughters from cervical cancer when there are other real dangers that call for more attention? Maybe the side effect of paralysis will slow down this trend.

 

Earlier today Mary Blu, a fellow blogger, http://mindtravels.wordpress.com/ stated the following, in a comment: Self worth. That is such a double edged concept today. You and I see it as it was meant, in how we see ourselves as human beings but the problen with society today is that self worth has become what many feel they are worth in worldy goods and they will aquire what they can in any manner they can. It’s not just the overly rich that have this attitude, one can see it in common people as well. It’s a sick sign of the times.

 

MY RESPONSE:

 

Mary Blu, you’re right! But I think that comes because too many people don’t know what self worth or self love is. Part of self worth/self love is an understanding and realization that you are no better or worse than anyone else. It’s also understanding and realizing that self worth is built through self knowledge, meeting daily challenges (overcoming challenges), discovering, exploring and expressing our passions, and helping others help themselves.  People telling you how great you are and how wonderful you are in encouragement – it’s not self worth.  You don’t give anyone self worth.  It’s something we build within ourselves by doing the above things.

 

Too many are confusing self worth with ego, material possessions and money. Those things have little to do with self worth/self love. The ranks of the rich and wealthy are filled with people who are experiencing self hate. Do you really think Leona Helmsley was a happy camper? Ask her family whether this was so! She didn’t leave them a penny. Gives 12 billion dollars to charity for dogs not realizing that those organizations will undoubtedly abuse those funds. Her behavior was of a person who put on that she was better than others ( `Taxes are for the little people.’) while feeling inside herself that she wasn’t up to snuff. Actions speak louder than words.

 

Rich people often get rich forgetting that the people they cheat in incomes and business are the same folks they count on to buy their product or service which hurts them in the pockets in the long run.

 

 

 

Ignorance in America has taken on new dimensions since spin, fibs, outright lies, and twisting of the truth, are now substitutes for the truth that the U.S. citizens eat up like a baby on pablum. The new level of ignorance in the U.S. today stems from citizens accepting their ignorance and going with it as though it’s the truth.  Often holding to the lie when they have been given the truth.

 

When one understands and realizes one’s ignorance, one then seeks information so they are no longer ignorant. Today’s U.S. citizen accepts their ignorance as though it’s the truth, and it hasn’t been exhibited better than in this election season. Folks will say, I WON’T VOTE FOR OBAMA BECAUSE I KNOW TOO LITTLE ABOUT HIM TO VOTE FOR HIM – I’M VOTING FOR MCCAIN. In a world with the internet, anyone making this statement is truly ignorant because the information is there to dispel one’s ignorance.

 

The other side of the coin, the same people who say they don’t know Obama don’t even know John McCain. The more you learn about this man, the more you know we don’t need him has a leader. If people will read about McCain’s past decisions, they will discover his poor judgment over his time in the Senate; including the Keating Five and the Savings and Loan Scams of the 80’s. He was wrong on Martin Luther King, Jr.  He’s wrong about the gas tax holiday and drilling for oil off-shore.  He’s wrong on NAFTA and Free Trade. He was wrong on the Banking Laws that have led to usury in credit and the housing mortgage scandal of today. Most of all, he was wrong on Iraq and Iran, as well as illegal immigration.

 

Clarity comes from having a desire to know the truth. Questioning the status quo or what everyone claims as true is the first step toward truth. Truth is, too many Americans don’t care about the truth, but their own personal take on life that is filled with untruths, spin and outright lies. It’s this ignorance that is running rampant throughout this country that is to our detriment as a nation going through change.  There is an energy in the U.S. to remain ignorant!

 

QUESTION EVERYTHING!  THAT’S WHERE THE TRUTH RESIDES.

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO YOURSELF? – The Things You Say Reflect Your Beliefs

The conversations we have with ourselves says a lot about how we feel about ourselves and the world. That little inner voice that goes on incessantly describing the world you live in. Making judgments about people, things and you.

But what are you telling yourself? What are the things that you say? More importantly, do you know how to turn it off? Stop the rambling?

I was speaking with my cousin the other night and he was saying the voice in his head is in a constant state of chatter. My inner voice used to be the same way but I learned to turn it off by attempting to find where the voice came from inside me. That exercise alone helped me to silence the voice. The instant I attempted to focus on its origin, it became quiet.

CONVERSATIONS WITH SELF – The things we say often reveal how we think and believe more than we would like to admit. And we often focus on negative messages to our body and self. `So and so is a pain in the ass or neck’, `You’re hurting my heart’, `You will be the death of me’, `Over my dead body’, `You make me sick’, `I’m a loser’, `I can’t’, `I can’t learn’, `You can’t know your future unless you know your past’, `We’ll never get along with White folks until we get our community together’, `The man will never let you get ahead’, `Asian drivers are the worse’, `Education is for White folks’, `Blacks are all drug dealers, criminals, and rappers’, `Mexicans are illegal aliens’, `All Whites are prejudice’, `My vote doesn’t mean anything’, `I’m not a good person’, `White women are easy’, `Black women are sluts’. All these conversation with self are based on beliefs you have about self and reality.

Often these conversations with self keep reinforcing invalid and conflicting beliefs within your belief system. When you say, `You give me a headache’, you are giving a signal to your body. If the body accepts the suggestion, you will start to get a headache when confronted with this person. Your body is listening to your thoughts and beliefs about self as suggestions. We affect our health through our beliefs about self and reality.

IS THIS WHAT IS BEHIND RACISM AND OTHER BIGOTRY? – Definitely! If we examine the beliefs we have of others we find a number of invalid and conflicting beliefs. Beliefs that have been accepted by you from people you love and respect. Sure, you may have been brought up that BLACK PEOPLE ARE INFERIOR, HOMOSEXUALS ARE PERVERTS, MEN ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN WOMEN, ETC., but remember that in order for a belief to be valid, it must hold true 100% of the time in your personal experiences.

Anyone with self love cannot be a bigot. They are mutually exclusive. In viewing others, the person with self love says, `There but for the Grace of God go I’ or at least sees they are no different from anyone else. Virtually every uncomfortable situation you can put another, can invariably be done to you. `What goes around, comes around.’ With this realization, it becomes unnecessary to fight bigotry. What we really need is a strong campaign for building self love within our society. Starting with giving parents the information needed to help them be better parents, and in changing the school curriculum to encompass it.

WHY DO PEOPLE BEHAVE LIKE BIGOTS? – Fear and ignorance! It’s the fear of the unknown and the unhappiness in one’s personal life. We often project our inner fears onto others. If you were brought up thinking you were better than others, when those people seem to be doing better than you in life there is a feeling of lacking self worth stemming from invalid and conflicting beliefs. The fear for this person is in the idea that they don’t match up with the one they thought was inferior.

An example: If I am White and live in an all White community, this may be the last vestige of how I can prove I am better than people different from me. To have a Black family move into my neighborhood is to no longer keep my idea of superiority. So I take it upon myself to insure my superiority by making hell for the Black family that wants to live here. The fear of the threat to my `superior status’ and the beliefs that go with it, make me feel right in burning crosses, leaving hate mail and becoming a real menace to that family. My ignorance of self also leads me to believe any immoral act I commit is justified just because their skin is Black. The person’s belief of superiority has caused him to engage in inferior behavior.

When you don’t know someone it’s easy to objectify that person. Ignorance of them as an individual makes it possible to demagogue that person. In the 70’s in the heyday of disco, I was working clubs on Long Island playing a combination of rock, pop and disco. Most clubs were mainly rock n roll bars with all White patrons, mainly men. I was able to sell my DJ service to the owners based on the fact that I would move drinks by the way I played the music. Believe me, the first few times were hairy. A Black guy coming into an all White rock n roll bar playing disco was not readily accepted by the patrons. This was Long Island before seeing Black folks was a common occurrence. My saving grace was that I knew my rock n roll inside and out, and knew how to rock the bar with it. The other good thing was playing disco brought in a lot of women, which led to more guys coming to the place.

But one of the ring leaders of a group of rowdy patrons who frequented the place just didn’t like me. Did he know me? Nope! Did he want to get to know me? Nope! So every night I was spinning he seemed to have a problem. It escalated to the point where he started kicking the DJ booth enough to affect the music. After a couple of warnings I came from behind the booth to confront him while the music was still playing. His boys were there with him and it looked like it was gonna be on. `What’s your problem?’ `I don’t like disco!’ `Hey man, look how many nice ladies have been coming into the club since I’ve been playing it. And I know you like the ladies?!’ He smiles and his buddies laugh. `Plus you know I know the rock n roll you want to hear. So what’s the problem?’ He says, `You got some Marshall Tucker?’ He ended up buying me a drink later and we ended up being very good friends for the duration of the four years I worked the club. When people get to know you, you seem less of a threat.

Self love can cure this. It takes work. But if we give our children these lessons early, through good parenting and an a self knowledge curriculum in our education system, this attitude would phase out in over time. Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself. And there are no exceptions for race, gender, nationality, religion, or sexual preference.

QUESTION EVERYTHING!  THAT’S WHERE THE TRUTH RESIDES.